She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
