Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
only if we run a train.
done.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Randomize