Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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