I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
