Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize