If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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