You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
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I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
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I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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