I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
