I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize