She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize