If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
