Everything about him screamed your future.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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