Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
