yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
