i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I need to sanitize my soul.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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