so let's talk penis.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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