ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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