Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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