I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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