Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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