How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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