If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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