Where is the hickey?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Randomize
