wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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