the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
