We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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