woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
My breasts were aching with rage.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
