so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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