Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
