that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
