and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
