i was born a porn star she said
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
