apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
