An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.