return my video game
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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