Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
