dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
