So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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