You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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