sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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