I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
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All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
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Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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