i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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