Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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