That's intense
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
