And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
