We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Welp...herpes.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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