Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize