why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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