HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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