just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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