Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
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All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
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Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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