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• (313): View more from Michigan

  So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Thats gay

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.

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• (808): View more from Hawaii

  Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.

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• (916): View more from California

  Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.

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• (530): View more from California

  I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!

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