guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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